April 15, 2012

BBP: big boy pants

having just survived potty training, i've had a few people ask me what i did so i thought i'd share my personal experience with the dreaded undertaking.  i know that at some point holden would show a natural interest in learning to use the potty but i, personally, didn't want to wait another year+ for that.  so, having heard there is a window around 20-26 months that a child can be somewhat easily potty trained, i thought i'd give it a go.

in my minimal research, i found that 90% of children were potty trained by 2 in the 1950's.  my brother and i began training at 18 months old thanks to our day care which was very standard as well.  it seemed to me that waiting for potty training until holden is 3+ is more a generational thing and not as much a physiological issue as it's put out there to be.  so, why wait another year?



needless to say, potty training boot camp started one week before easter (when holden was 23 months).  this was perhaps a bit overzealous as i was hosting easter for our extended family but that's just my typical poor form.  it seems like parenthood is sort of that way.  you have bouts of confidence and a feeling of "i got this" and just as soon as you get that feeling, something changes, and you're thrown once again into the parenthood gauntlet.  poor planning aside, holden's school had spring break and i was going to knock this out if it killed me.

the plan: no more diapers while awake.  pull-ups during his nap and at night.  eagle eye attention trying to gain any sense of warning on my part (that never came).  i had heard that on day 3, the child may get it right half the time.  that was not the case for me.  on day five, holden finally got it and once he did, it was pretty much a slam dunk.

he's still not letting me know he needs to go but he goes like clock work if i set him on the potty and tell him to go.  it's odd to think about being placed on a potty every couple of hours and being told to go.  luckily, holden is totally impressionable and hasn't matured enough to resent me...those days are coming.

my tips:

1. (for boys only...girls wear nothing) buy at least 12-15 basic, thin white underpants because you'll go through all of them each day for the first couple of days.  it's best to just run a load of piping hot laundry at the end of the day and not have to worry about running out of clean, dry pants.

2. buy a very basic, portable potty.  i have the baby bjorn pictured (no sound effects or lights necessary).  it needs to be portrayed to the child that it's necessary and expected of them.  i can also keep this in the back of my suv and, yes, we've used it while out and about.  i think it's important for the child to soon learn that they are also expected to hold it and use the potty outside the home as they do inside.

3. spend a lot of time outdoors so that the stress of your child peeing on rugs and furniture is minimized.  you'll be anxious enough as it is.

4. i hate to admit it, but you may want a really good bride.  i tried m&m's but holden isn't big on sweets so it wasn't really getting him motivated.  turns out, the ipad did.  i stocked up on about 8 good age-appropriate games and he was in love.  one caution: the ipad was too distracting while he was sitting on the potty so it became an "if you...then you get to play the ipad."  they really do need to focus on what it feels like to use those muscles.

5. "try" to go every hour until they begin to get it.  however, do not be discouraged when it seems like no progress has been made after several days.  for me, progress happened like a switch...nothing gradual about it.

6. hang in there.  it'll happen.  and buckle up because it's seriously taxing but so worth it.  holden still reminds me that he is using the potty just to get a big congrats and "i'm proud of you" a few times a day.  (it's pretty darn cute and my crazy excitement for him is not the least bit over-exaggerated.  i'm so proud of him)

7. and last but not least: stock the fridge with your favorite alcoholic beverage because you'll probably need it.

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